Neal Raisman

Dr. Neal Raisman is Emma’s and Jack’s “zaddi” or grandfather which he considers his number one job. But Dr. Raisman is also the leading authority and consultant on customer service and retention in higher education. Dr. Raisman’s best selling books such as The Power Of Retention: More Customer Service In Higher Education have been purchased by 63% of all colleges in the US. His latest book is From Admissions to Graduation: Increasing Growth through Collegiate Customer Service. His customer service and retention blog www.academicmaps.blogspot.com with its discussions of recent research and solutions to customer service issues is very popular and read by over 2,000 colleges, universities and business that work with academia each week He has two children. Isaac who died of meningitis at age 26 and Shana who is 42 and mother to Jack and Emma. Neal is a highly sought after speaker, trainer, consultant, researcher, and marketer on customer service. His firm, N.Raisman & Associates is the leading customer service consulting group for retention, enrollment, morale and marketing for higher education and businesses that work with colleges in the US, Canada and Europe. He has a PhD from the University of Massachusetts in Amherst in neurolinguistics, was a Fulbright Fellow in France; has published six books, over 400 articles and the blog www.academicmaps.blogspot.com; won numerous academic and marketing awards and accolades. But, little makes him prouder than his family and when his dog Hersch listens to him.

Articles:

Is God Big Enough to Accept Our Anger?

Excerpt from Standing on One Leg by Neal Raisman which is available through the author at iduhpres@hotmail.com The first time we went to Compassionate Friends, a self-help grief group for parents who had lost children, was on Suffolk County on Long Island. A faculty member at the college told me about it. Compassionate Friends had helped his wife and him when their son/stepson died. We needed help, so we went. We had talked to the rabbi at our temple but he was too into the role of rabbi as platitude to help us. We really did not need a sad […]

How Many Children Do I Have Now?

Excerpt from Standing on One Leg by Neal Raisman which is available through the author at iduhpres@hotmail.com How many children do you have? Do I have? Did I have? How do I answer that? How do I stop the rising sadness as I think. I had two. Now. One? No two. He always exists/ Even if he doesn’t. He is here. No. I don’t know where he is. Is he anywhere? I have one. Shana. But I had two Shana and Issac. So what is the answer? How can I respond without denying him or the truth. I have one […]

Ground Hog Days

This is an excerpt from Standing on One Leg by Neal Raisman available from the author at iduhpres@hotmail.com The first weeks and months were like the movie, Groundhog Day. I began each day the same way. Waking. Feeling a free floating anger. Seeing his body on the floor and shuddering in the reality of his death. Struggling to push myself out of bed. Not wanting to get up. The bed and sleep being the only place and time when I could momentarily forget reality. Sleep became a blessing. A time when the horror of that day did not repeat itself […]

Can Grief Be As Silent as Death Itself?

This is an excerpt from Standing on One Leg by Neal Raisman available from the author at iduhpres@hotmail.com Loss is not always the screaming in the halls of the hospital. Or at the crash. Scene of the crime. Death is often not dramatic. Not as dramatic as my 26-year-old son lying dead on his bedroom floor. No. It often comes quite away from the living. Quietly. Taking without anyone knowing. Maybe even the victim. Sudden and quiet. No screams. No sudden awareness. Forget angels and choirs. Bright light or tunnels. Just a sudden nothing and quiet to be shattered by […]

Son’s Death Like the Loss of a Limb

Grief? I can only explain it one way to those who ask how I am. To anyone who dares ask if I am getting over it. My son’s death was like having a leg cut off, the edge where it was hacked off remaining raw and exposed, scabbing over at times, just waiting for someone to rip the scab off with a question or comment to again expose the raw meat of pain to the air. Once you’ve lost a leg, it is always gone. I constantly miss it, phantom pain reminding me of the loss. I’m secretly jealous of all […]

A Candy Heart: When ‘Celebrating’ Doesn’t Seem Right

Valentine’s Day. Another day to feel my loss more deeply? Why do these celebrations continue to come up to remind me of my loss? To have others enjoy when I don’t seem to rise to the occasion. To send a Valentine’s Day card when I have lost my son? Can I celebrate the day and not betray his memory? Not cause extra grieving for for me. For him? Perhaps if we define the word celebrate, that might give me some answer. So what does it mean? Some of its meaning is to rejoice, to commemorate, to mark an event. What can […]

Ground Hog Days: How it Really Feels to Lose a Child

The first weeks and months were like the movie Groundhog Day. I began each day the same way. Waking. Feeling a free floating anger. Seeing his body on the floor and shuddering in the reality of his death. Struggling to push myself out of bed. Not wanting to get up. The bed and sleep being the only place and time when I could momentarily forget reality. Sleep became a blessing. A time when the horror of that day did not repeat itself endlessly like a looped bit of video. Finally shoving myself to get up. Get dressed. Trying to remember […]

The Empty Holiday Plate

The holidays. Thanksgiving. Christmas. Chanukah. Kwanza. Times to be happy and celebrate. For others, but not for me. For me, it is a time of an empty plate at the table. A remembrance of my child. My child used to sit at that plate heaping turkey and potatoes on his plate. A smile on his eager face. But no more. No more will I see him and that plate will remain empty. Empty as my heart, I fear. And all around me, will be celebrating and smiling while I feel I have little to celebrate or smile about. He is […]

Wishing the Holidays Would Go On By

At least I don’t have to deal with Christmas. It must be terrible for those who used to rejoice in the holiday. One less present under the tree. One less diner at dinner. One less reason to go on. And everyone else happy and smiling. It’s Christmas. The happiest time of the year. Rejoice in the season. Or else.” Joy for them maybe. But not for us. Just a mean reminder of how much has been lost. How hollow the day is. And they want you to be happy. To join in and decorate the tree. Hang holly when you’d […]